Right now valued readers of GDTH, I’m struggling internally. Here is why. My Big Girl (BG) just got a job! I still tear up when I think about the fact that she can work now. Literally, she was hired on January 8, 2016. She worked Wednesday 1/13, Saturday 1/16, Sunday 1/17, and was supposed to return Tuesday 1/19. On Tuesday 1/19 she contacted the supervisor and quit.
BG let me know the night before. We had a long
talk text about her decision. She says that she thought it would interfere with her semester because she is taking 3 core classes necessary to graduate. She also said the environment made her anxious, her supervisor’s were unsupportive and sat in the back of the store on their phones, and her crew members and/or store was disgusting, too disgusting for her to bare.
I encouraged her to finish the pay period and then talk with them about her concerns with school, she did not want to. I then attempted to convince her to at least finish the schedule and suggested that maybe she could better tolerate her personal issues with her working environment once she got her first pay check, again NO! I finally said that if she was certain that it was not a good fit and she was determined to quit then call first thing in the morning and explain why she would not be returning. She did and she states that she was thanked for calling and letting them know.
Now I’m struggling with how I handled the situation. I attempt to prepare my children for the real world and I’m not sure that I did this in this situation. In the adult world, is it that easy to quit a job or should it be? Should I have given her the “in the real world” talk? Should I make this a teachable moment? Or should I support her decisions and continue to encourage her keep looking for suitable employment?
The other reason I struggle is because I blog, study, and breath personal finance. I feel like I should be living the example and demonstrating what I want my children to learn about responsibility and money management. Therefor, because I would never walk away from my employment (unless I already had something else) nor quit something because of how uncomfortable it was, I’m uncomfortable with not encouraging or maybe demanding her to do the same.
Additionally, I’m a firm believer in when the going gets tough, the tough gets going. I’m living proof. In high school, I had a child, maintained the honor roll, was in the National Honor Society, and worked! I took 5 classes for three semesters to graduate in 2008, with three children, and a job. I entered grad school with three little children and a full time job. One semester I had to complete an internship at night so I literally worked from 7:30 to 5:30 pm and then went to an intern at a mental health facility from 6:00 pm to 12:00 am for an entire semester. I now work a full time, 2 side hustles, and blog. My ish is tough, so I’ve gotten tougher. But is that unrealistic for her.
I often struggle with traits of my own that my children lack. I internalize it, and feel that I’m insufficient. I get hard on myself to feel better about what I think are their inadequacies. This may very well be one of those moments. Maybe I’m more upset that I didn’t have the opportunity to teach her more about money management. I don’t know.
I am very proud of her. She was determined to get a job and she got one! She is standing for what she thinks is of more value which is her education, and I agree. Finally, she still does want to work, and is diligently putting in applications for weekend employment, so no disappointment there.
So valued GDTH readers, what do you think? What would you have done? Would you have handled the situation differently?